Nancy V Canfield
Retired retro who writes during television commercials. If you're the type of person who doesn't like to take life too seriously, then we'll get along just fine. My family says I'm overly opinionated and bossy, but I think I'm just fermenting. Grab a glass of wine, sit back, and hopefully you'll find something here that will make you smile.
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- Page Views
- 262,198
- Content
- 717
- Fans
- 201
- Contributor since
- 1/31/2009
Education/Experience
H/S graduate, SOHNInterests
Reading, television, sketching, writing, music, politics, food, gardening, decorating, humor, common sense, and trying to outsmart my family.Motto
It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
Displaying Results 1 - 200 (of 717) for All Content
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Elizabeth Taylor: SurvivorA different look at the life of Elizabeth Taylor. -
Who Are These People Supporting Charlie Sheen and What Have They Done with Their Brains?Is Charlie Sheen really winning? -
Jon Cryer: The Other Guy in "Two and a Half Men"You know who I mean. He's the other guy in "Two and a Half Men." -
Look Out World!Ella Ann has arrived. -
Bathrobes, Birthdays, and ByrdsA Southern Birthday Party -
Privacy IssuesWe're too sensitive to privacy issues! -
Lockdown!Trouble brewing, a Milo long. -
America's Finest News Source Debunked!America's finest news source might not be what it claims. -
Painful Choices in an Economic DownturnI have no idea what this is about.
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Indiana: Is it for Sale?Selling the state of Indiana for just one night. Well, why not?
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Clinton to U.S. Citizens: Vacation in the Congo, by All MeansOkay, Hillary, as long as you come and rescue me
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United States Postal Service Gone Crazy, or Just PMG Donahoe?The USPS has nothing to "celebrate" just yet.
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Five of the Top Wine Hangover Cures, and Then SomeFinding the cure for too much wine.
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The Best Little Chinese Restaurant in Southern MaineA review of Green Leaves Chinese Restaurant and Lounge in York, Maine. -
Do the Academy Awards Need a Little Self-Editing?How to shorten up the Academy Award Presentation -
Charlie Sheen Vs Charlie Harper: Which is Which?"Two and a Half Men" is said to be loosely based on Charlie Sheen, but has there been a total role reversal in favor of fantasy?
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Dunkin' Donuts Entrepreneur Extraordinaire William RosenbergHow Dunkin' Donuts began. -
Elizabeth Taylor, Cat on a Hot Tin Roof? Far from It!A glimpse into the life and career of Elizabeth TaylorAlso published on: -
Money MattersThis is obviously about money matters. Sheesh. -
Almost Falling DownSometimes the fear of something is worse than the something. -
My New Little Teeny Tiny Turquoise Cell PhoneCell phone instruction class 101 -
Why Do Some Celebrities Crash and Burn?Some stars make it and some are eaten alive by fame.
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Winter Doldrums, Through the Eyes of a DogSnow scenes from Feb 2, 2011
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Well, Wrap Me in Chocolate and Call Me a ValentineChocolate: the perfect Valentine's Day gift.
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The Best Reality TV Show of All TimeA look at a real reality show, Allen Funt's "Candid Camera"
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Rare Romantic Moments of 'NCIS'A look at three special moments on NCIS
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Goodbye, Bernard SchwartzLosing a friend
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State of the Union, Yadda Yadda YaddaWhy do we need a SOTU address?
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How to Take the Romance Out of WineBy discovering the birthplace of the first vineyard.
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Let it Snow -- AgainMore perils of winter.
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Octomom: Octomoron?Just when we thought she had walked off into the sunset, here she is...again.
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Eat a Bug!At a loss as to what to serve for dinner? Eat bugs!
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The Princess Diana Authentic Duplicate Royal Heirloom Engagement Ring, Sort OfShould I or shouldn't I?
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Maine Lobster: Pure and SimpleThere is only one way to thoroughly enjoy Maine lobster, no matter what the "experts" say.
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Let It Snow!A few snow scenes, and the storm hasn't arrived yet!
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Five Famous Sci-Fi Television Show IntroductionsWhich ones do you remember?
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America's Love Affair with ViolenceA dark day for the news media
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Keep Your Paws Off My Food!Eating dinner with kids run amok
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John Wayne: The Definition of 'True Grit'Ronald Reagan's thoughts on the Duke.
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What Happened to TV Westerns?A look at six classic television Westerns
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The Little Black New Year's Eve Slut DressJust looking through my New Year's wardrobe of yesteryear
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The Day AfterChristmas isn't over...just yet.
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Traditional Christmas Libations: EggnogThe time honored tradition of celebrating Christmas.
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Traditional Christmas Foods: The FruitcakeBlame the British for the fruitcake.
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Merry Christmas!Just looking at Christmas at the crazyhouse.
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If I Could Talk to the Plant-imalsThe sister is talking to her plants again
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My Choices of Television and Movie Stars of the Year, and My Christmas Gifts to ThemGifts for the stars that have everything
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The Cellardoor Winery and Vineyard in Lincolnville, MaineWhat? A vineyard? In Maine?
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Heeere's Johnny!Johnny Carson quotes and trivia
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Remarks from the Christmas Peanut GalleryThe peanut gallery is celebrating Christmas.
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The Gentleman Has Retired from ServiceRetirement reflections and thanks
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Gene Simmons Faces His DemonsA revealing episode of Gene Simmons Family Jewels
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Knee-Walking: An Exercise DisasterWhen will I ever learn?
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The Battle of the BulgeTracking what we eat may not be right for everyone.
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The Psychology of Over ThinkingI wonder why we are so "into" over thinking.
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Whining is for SissiesDon't you hate whiners? I know I do.
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Ruby's Wood Grill in York, MaineAlmost every town has a favorite meeting place, a bar or restaurant that attracts locals wanting to meet up with friends, watch a game, or grab a bite to eat. Ruby's Wood Grill is exactly that type of place, where just about everybody knows your name.
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Keeping the Christ in ChristmasTaking a look at Christmas today.
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Small BlessingsJust a few after Thanksgiving thoughts
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Why I Should Be Dead from Eating Thanksgiving DinnerI didn't follow all the new rules
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Twelve Days of Christmas TravelWhat to expect when traveling this Christmas
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Five Reasons Why I Never Shop on Black FridayI left out the "Death Wish" thing
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LemayHello world.
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Don't Touch My Junk!Looking at TSA security procedures.
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How the Technology of Television Saved My Life (a Few Times), and Maybe YoursTelevision really is a life-saving technology
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Old Age Entitlement UpdateAn update on my old age strategy, and a few more entitlements I've discovered.
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Take Bullying by Its Ugly HornsBullying is not new, but it has taken on a new life.
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Stalking WalmartWhat are some of those WalMartians thinking?
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Scare Tactics, Deflections, and Other CrapSo much for the debt commission.
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Stupid is as Stupid DoesWe all do stupid things from time to time.
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Stuart Woods: Mystery Writer Extraordinaire or Just Plain Fun?A review of Stuart Woods mystery novels.
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Twelve Stars of TV Hit Show M*A*S*H: Where Are They Now?Has there been life after M*A*S*H? Well, for most.
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Flo's Hot Dogs in Cape Neddick Maine: A Trip Back in TimeIf you know southern Maine, you know Flo's.
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Favorite "NCIS" Episodes and Quotes: Seasons 1-7Favorite episodes from each season and quotes from each.
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Bottle of Wine, Fruit of the VineIn wines, expensive is not always better.
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E.T. Phoned Home!That mysterious streak over California? It's the return of E.T.
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The Goldenrod: Penny Candy for a Penny and Oh, Those Candy Kisses!A review of the Goldenrod in York Beach, Maine
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"NCIS" Recap: Season 8 Episode 6: "Cracked"A recap of "Cracked."
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Vietnam Veteran's Memorial: The WallLooking to a war memorial for...peace.
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Election Reflection: The Bottom LineSo, now what?
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The Ogunquit Playhouse 2010 SeasonA short history and review of the 2010 season
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The VeteranRemember Veteran's Day
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Finding Yahoo!Trying to find my articles on Yahoo.
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I Just Got Off the Phone with Bubba!Yessirree! Bubba got my number!
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Lost in ConversationA normal conversation around here goes something like this.
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Remarks from the Peanut Gallery XXIVGet you peanuts ready!
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Halloween AftermathI wonder what ingenious prank we'll find this year?
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Associated Content Contest! Win Big!Writing for Associated Content is...uh, puzzling.
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Help!I'm in a pickle and need some advice. Quickly!
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You Might Be an "NCIS" Freak If ... You Can Answer These Trivia QuestionsKnowing the name of Abby's farting hippo is not enough to be a real "NCIS" freak.
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Support Bacteria! They're the Only Culture Some People HaveWe live in filth
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Why I Dumped Tom Selleck and Why He Had it ComingBaby does not sit in a corner!
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Do You Think I Look Fat?Well, do you?
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Want a Little "Magnum" with Your "Blue Bloods"?The hit show "Blue Bloods" needs some "Magnum-esque" quirks.
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My Expert Predictions in Six Top Political RacesSix sure bets in the upcoming elections
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911 What is Your Emergency?A short story of horror.
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Boyd Gaming's Gamble: Out with the Stardust but Where is the Echelon?Just a few thoughts on the Stardust Resort and Casino
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And How was Your Day?Let me tell you about my day...
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Christmas Carols: Let's All Go A-Wassailing...Whatever That MeansA few Christmas carol titles might need a tweak or two.
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How to Decorate for ChristmasEight decorating steps for Christmas
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Taco TuesdayDinner at the nephew's.
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Five Changes "NCIS" Should Make, and Five Changes" NCIS" Should Never MakeIt's never easy to improve on a winner, but here are a few suggestions for the writers of "NCIS."
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Top Five Reasons I Am a Real BitchWe all have a little bitchiness in us. Revel in it!
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Did You Ever Wonder Why.......A Few More Soul Searching QuestionsStimulating brain exercises for the discerning intellectual.
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Election ReflectionMy thoughts on the upcoming elections
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The Mammogram: Git 'Er Done, Ladies!My contribution to National Breast Cancer Awareness Month
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The Body Beautiful"old" ain't all that it's cracked up to be
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Betty White: The Golden Girls' "Last Rose"Betty White will always be "Rose," albeit the last Rose of "The Golden Girls."
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Never Green!Uh, oh...I'm gonna get pay back for this one!
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Save the Planet! Die Green!Living green is one thing, but dying green?
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HomeThere is a sense of safety, warmth and familiarity associated with home.
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"Bar Americain" at Mohegan SunA young manager named Christopher Catanesi helps make this place a success.
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Currier Meets Ives...The Rest is HistoryWho hasn't soaked in the nostalgia of a Currier and Ives print? From the spirit of the seasons to steamboat races to sailing the vast oceans, we seem to be enchanted by the Currier and Ives lithographs of Americana.
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Ban Religious Jewelry! Get that Cross Off Your Neck!What's next for the PC police?
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Lost ShadowsA poem
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Quick! Send This Prayer on in Seven Minutes or You Will Die!... I'm going to take a walk on the wild side....and delete every one I receive from this day forward.
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Hello EveryoneI have been experiencing some technical difficulties.
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The Good Guys...Good Grief?By my estimation, the action in this show should have pretty much leveled Dallas by now, but reality is far from what makes The Good Guys a rocking good time.
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MRSA in Maine: Lobstermen Have More to Worry About Than the WeatherMRSA now plaques the tiny island of Vinalhaven
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Did You Ever Wonder Why....?Just kicking back wondering about some things.
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Halloween, Starring Michael Moore....Or Is it Michael Myers?I just can't keep those two huggables straight.
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Pregnancy Symptoms:Ten Reasons I Think I'm PregnantI have the symptoms.
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The Middle Child: My Own FashionistaA brief glimpse into the world of the middle child. These are pictures of what she considers to be normal things to do while shopping for Halloween, and you people think I embarrass her?
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Do Real Men Wear Stilettos?The "newest" in men's fashion.
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There's a Sucker Born Every MinuteAnd a sucker-upper too.
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American Idol Part DeuxI want to select the judges! Maybe I can keep Idol from dying a painful death.
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DON"T Be Touchin' My Stuff!Why do kids have to look with their hands?
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Happiness Is...Things that make me happy.
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In Maine, Sometimes You Can't Get Thayah from HeyahLife in Maine
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West Wings WoesA change of guard in the West Wing.
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How to Prepare for Fall CleaningTo clean for fall, one must plan, prepare, and execute carefully.
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I Guarantee You Will Yawn While Reading ThisWhy do we yawn?
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Remarks from the Peanut Gallery XXIIII go away for a couple of days and things fall apart. Let me get my peanuts.
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Tilting at WindmillsThe Kibby Mountain Wind Project
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"NCIS": A Eclectic Blend of CharactersFor seven seasons, "NCIS" has continued to entertain, amuse, and thrill its fans.
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I'll Be Baa-ackGone moosin'
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Norman Rockwell: The Gift that Keeps on GivingNorman Rockwell is the true spirit of Americana.
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"Constitutional" Rights: Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness?Are you sure these are constitutional rights?
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My Shocking Love Affair with Tom SelleckThis is the story of my long and torrid love affair with Tom Selleck.
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Welcome to America!The path to American citizenship.
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Age Related Memory Loss: Welcome It! Embrace It! Use It!It's not such a bad thing...
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Holy Botox, Batman!Looking at the Botox craze.
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Modern Art: A Trip to MOMAA short trip via the Internet through MoMA in New York
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The Sainz and the JetsJust my opinion on this silly story.
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A Couple of Things I Don't like About Commenting on Associated Content from Yahoo!You can't un-ring a bell, or that comment you screwed up.
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Michael Moore and the MosqueMichael Moore is matching the first $10,000 donated to help build the Mosque in New York.
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9/11 Thoughts and MemoriesRemembering 9/11
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Remarks from the Peanut Gallery XXIIChucking lots of peanuts from the cheap seats today!
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Buying a New Car Rule #1: Leave the Old Farts HomeThe grandniece just purchased her own car, without help from anyone...not even me or the ex.
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Do You Sneeze While You're Sleeping?Sneezing is unique, and can be hazardous for some.
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Man Bags: A Blight on Hu"man"ity?Men were not created to carry a purse.
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Hurricane Earl Update: Sept 3, 2010 7:28 P.MHurricane Earl update!
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Hurricane Earl: Armageddon!I wish he would just get here and go along.
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Tooth Whitener: Smile Brightener or Just a Wallet Lightener?My tooth whitening experience.
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We Are a Nation of Immigrants!So why all the fuss over immigration?
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Remarks from the Peanut Gallery XXIEarl isn't the only thing stirring up trouble. Terrorist food has been identified in restaurants!
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Hurricane Earl Alert!Are you prepared for hurricane season?
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The American DreamWho determines what the American Dream is? For me, I do.
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Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader (or Your Own Kids)?Deciphering kidspeak. What you think they're saying might not be the case.
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The IRenew Bracelet: Magical Money-Making Mojo?I guess I'll never know.
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Top Five Really Stupid Questions and the Top Five Really, Really Stupid AnswersHoney, does this make me look fat?
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Remarks from the Peanut Gallery XXMoonshine, Roger Clemens, and mayhem in Maine
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LUNESTA: What About Those Pesky Little Side Effects?Is the cure worse than the ailment?
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Al Gore: BigfootI've done my part in energy conservation. Well, more than Big Al has anyway...
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Kitchen Gadgets and Thumbless Pot HoldersThere is no end to the time and space saving kitchen gadgets that we accumulate
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The Other "Snooki"Contrary to popular belief, there was another Snooki, spelled with a "Y".
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The Maine State Flower: The Porta Potty?A discussion on the underrated porta potty plant.
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Do Gentlemen Prefer Dumb Blonds that Have More Fun?From Marilyn Monroe to Lady Gaga, dumb blonds are laughing all the way to the bank.
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Seven Gaffes of Good TasteSpouting off about the erosion of good taste.
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Robbing Peter to Pay PaulI was only following the example of Congress.
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Remarks from the Peanut Gallery IXXJust restocked my peanut stash, and none to soon!
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The Chelsea Clinton Wedding...Jackpot!Let's see what people are saying.
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"Gene Simmons Family Jewels"..Surprisingly Entertaining"Gene Simmons Family Jewels" is a real jewel.
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The Barb and the BashWhen will the bashing stop?
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Medical Marijuana in Maine-The Way Life Should Be?Have a high time in Vacationland.
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"Would You like to Rethink that Last Statement?"People say the darndest things. Especially politicians.
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The Other "N" WordPutting a positive spin on a negative word.
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My Thingy's BrokeIs yours?
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Fried Leftover SpaghettiUh, this is about frying leftover spaghetti...
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Law Enforcement Needs Me!Becoming a law enforcement professional.
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The Cranky Consumer Rates the "Bark-Off"A review of yet another sucker gadget.
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Remarks from the Peanut Gallery XVIIII'm out of peanuts now.
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Barefoot in the BahamasThe odyssey of the Barefoot Bandit ends.
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Garden Slugs and BudweiserAre you kidding me? Wasting good beer to kill garden slugs?
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The Funny Side of American PresidentsHumor in the White House, from both sides of the aisle.
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Product Review: The "Green" Portable Air ConditionerA review of a recent "green" portable air conditioner.
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Like, Poor Lindsay Lohan and the Like, Mean Old JudgeMy like opinion of like the whole like sordid like affair.
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The Photo AlbumDust them off, sit down, and enjoy.
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Who is that Old Woman?Just when did I get so old looking?
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Let Freedom RingA Fourth of July haiku
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Remarks from the Peanut Gallery XVIITurn those frowns upside down!
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2020 CensusA glimpse of what the 2020 census might be like.
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SummerA poem about summer
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ChangeWhat does change mean to you?
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The Curse of TechnologyWhat did we do in the Dark Ages?
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Purple Who?Haiku
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My Interview with Our Own Lady GagaCelebrity interviews are not easy.
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Happy Birthday to MeWhat's so great about a "birthday"?
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Remarks from the Peanut Gallery XVIIJust a few harmless lobs today.























